Choosing the right attorney for your divorce can feel very overwhelming. You likely have input from a lot of “helpful” friends and relatives as to who is “good” or “bad” when it comes to divorce attorneys in your area. I don’t doubt that you also have people telling you to hire a “shark” so that you get what is owed to you. This article will outline what to look for in an attorney and offer you concrete ways to make sure you are hiring the right attorney for you.
Shark v. Strategy
The first step in your process should be to understand the types of divorce attorneys. In my view, attorneys tend to fall into one of two categories: the shark attorney or the strategic attorney. Contrary to popular opinion, you do not want to hire the shark attorney.
Here’s why:
The attorney you choose is going to be your face in the negotiations (and, if in court, litigation). You not only want someone who truly understands you, but who can effectively advocate for you so that their time (and, ehem, your money) is well spent. A shark attorney is typically just focused on beating whatever drum their client told them to beat – regardless if their client has a true chance of getting what they are requesting. This often increases the drama unnecessarily, delays resolution, and creates a big expensive mess.
A strategic attorney is focused on understanding your goals and crafting a strategy that will get you to those goals in as cost effective a way as possible. When a divorce attorney is strategic, you can see less drama, faster resolution, and lower counsel fee bills.
(Check out this podcast with Susan Guthrie if you want to hear 30+ minutes of me talking about this topic and what exactly to look for in a divorce attorney!)
The Hiring Process
So, now that you are on board with hiring a strategic attorney, there are a few steps you should take to make sure that the attorney you are hiring is right for you. Hiring the right divorce attorney is a critical decision that does require a bit of your time. Below, I will outline a few items to consider as you move through this process. Then, at the end of this article, you can download my free guide which gives you my simple process for how to choose the right divorce attorney for your case.
Experience and Attitude
Experience is important but it isn’t everything. When you are hiring a divorce attorney – you want experience and attitude. You want to make sure that the attorney has several years of experience in their field. Direct experience in litigation and negotiation of family matters is irreplaceable and can significantly impact how the matter plays out. You want to make sure that your divorce attorney has the following:
- In depth knowledge of divorce and family law
- A comfortable nature in the courtroom / in chambers with a judge
- Experience crafting strategies that are unique to each case rather than a “one size fits all” approach
- Knowledge of the judges in your area that will likely hear your case
When an attorney possesses the above three qualities, they will be well equipped to handle the variety of situations (foreseen and unforeseen) that could happen in a family law matter.
However, experience isn’t the only thing. You also need an attorney with a good attitude. By this I mean, you want an attorney who other people like working with and who judges like to have appear before them. All the experience in the world doesn’t matter if people dislike the attorney so much that they tune them out the minute said individual sets foot in the courtroom. (Tip: If you enjoy interacting with your attorney, chances are other people like to interact with them too).
Cost Conscious
Divorce can be expensive. We know that. But, a good divorce attorney knows how to handle a case in a cost conscious manner so that your funds are strategically spent in areas. Stated differently, you want to make sure that the attorney you hire continually engages in a “cost / benefit analysis” for each issue. If you are not gaining traction in a certain area, the attorney needs to know when and how to pivot your case to gain traction. Some examples of this are knowing when to utilize out of court methods of resolution (like mediation) to avoid a costly and contentious court battle.
Relatedly, a reputable divorce attorney will be clear and up front with you about the costs for divorce, their hourly fees, and how those fees are calculated. They should be able to anticipate additional costs, and keep you well apprised of their fees. A good divorce attorney will address all of this, directly, in their initial consult because the cost of a divorce (and how to keep the costs down) is just as important as any other topic in a divorce matter.
Good and Timely Communication
Your attorney should be able to communicate with you in plain English. They need to be able to break down complicated topics so that you can easily grasp them. A good divorce attorney should also keep you updated about important developments in your case as they arise. You may want to ask your attorney their preferred methods of communication (email, phone call, text message, client portal, etc.) as you will want to make sure that their preferred method of communication is one that works for you.
Ethical and Honest
It should go without saying that you want an attorney who is ethical and honest with you. There can be some hard conversations in a divorce matter. Your attorney needs to be able to have those conversations with you, directly, rather than beat around the bush. An honest attorney will be clear with you about the pitfalls you face as you move forward and they must also tell you when a request is simply not possible. One way to know if your divorce attorney is honest and ethical – think through your conversations with them. Have they sugarcoated their communication with you or guaranteed you a certain result? If so, you may want to keep looking for an attorney who can be honest with you and tell you the range of results that are possible.
Likability and Interest
These factors are often not given as much weight as they deserve. Which is a mistake because you will be spending a lot of time talking with your attorney and interacting with them. If you find your attorney frustrating, or mean, or difficult – that’s not going to bode well for you! When you like interacting with your attorney you are more apt to connect with them to share important information about your case which will help them to represent you better. Even more, an attorney that you feel comfortable around can help keep you at ease when the tension is high.
Further, your attorney needs to seem interested in your case. A good divorce attorney will engage with you in an empathetic way, they will listen to understand you, and keep you focused on the relevant parts of the puzzle. They will provide a safe and non-judgmental space for you to share your concerns, fears, and goals because they truly care about finding a resolution custom fit for you.
What Next?
If you’ve made it this far, you have a good idea of the key factors to think about when considering hiring an attorney. Next, you need to select the right attorney for you. Lucky for you – I have a guide that takes you through a simple 3 step process to finding and hiring the right attorney for you. You can download it here: Guide To Hiring An Attorney
Lauren L. Hunt: New York Divorce Attorney
If you have more questions, I want to hear from you. Schedule a consultation by calling our office at
518-282-7300, or, make an appointment online, and let us help you start the next chapter.
